Disaster at Sea

The first thing you might think is "Stuart, last weeks' post was about your foolishness. That story's been told. You've milked that cow, it's dry. Do you think Harry Potter sold millions of copies by going back to the Chamber of Secrets every single book?!". You're right about that. I was hoping this week's post would be about 'New Things Tried', of which I have a few, but things went in such a.... destructive direction, that I've no choice but to share my day with you.Join me for dinner and story time as I recreate the unfortunate events that unfolded in Hong Kong just the other day (and when I say dinner, I mean knocking a jar of spagetti sauce onto the floor so it shatters into a goopy-yet-sharp mess. Then you give up on dinner and get old sushi and tubed wasabi from the supermarket). Just read it, because if nothing good comes of these misfortunes, then it will all be for nothing.

I have a friend in Hong Kong that I know through my younger days playing video games with people. We were part of a 'community', and although it might sound silly to you, we spent a decent amount of time together and got to know one another over the years (I've known Nathan for 8 years now). This is the same community that led me to Katrineholm in Sweden to have the most intense Swedish hangs that may have resulted in a masterpiece of a what'sapp video. But I digress... He's been my go-to-hang-out-with-and-learn-about-the-city person when it comes to Hong Kong, and it's been through him that I've met some pretty interesting people. I've included a few maps of Hong Kong because of reasons. 


The Plan: Nathan (and another one of his friends, Dickson) and I were to traverse Shelter Bay on Hong Kong's western coastline to a nearby inlet with a shoreline cafe with maximum photographic and letter-writing potentials. We were to go by kayak because they rent them and there are few other ways for physically limited out-of-shape individuals such as ourselves (other options would include windsurfing and standing-up-paddling-on-a-big-surfboard-thing). I agreed because it was an opportunity to be active and take pictures of things. I also know a thing or two about kayaking because I did a camp thing for a while (which brings up the memory of my first days at camp when I claimed to know how to stern a canoe because I had used a kayak once. This was for a 3 day canoe trip, mind you, so you can imagine how awfully that went), I was excited to get back into that. The map you see above is of Hong Kong, the other part of 'China-not-China'. The box in blue outlines Shelter Bay, the area we attempted to cross for a bit of exercise and good eating. All in all, it sounded like a good day, so you can imagine my disappointment when things went awry.


The Execution:

We wound up at the establishment with cash in head, ready to hit the high seas with a casual level of enthusiasm that attempted to mask our apparent ineptitude at the task at hand.We were renting hollow kayaks that you sit on top of rather than inside. This doesn't make them any less stable, but it allows waves and other Chinese schmutz from the sea to splash into your lap and collect around your feet and under your bum (and soak into your pants). The same can be said of the luggage compartment, which while having straps to hold down your belongings, has no drainage from said Chinese schmutzy seawater. 
This is the other two-thirds of the crew. They took a double because they were even less confident in their seamanship than me (my attitude is usually 'Welp, others have done it. I can do it too. How hard can it be?). If you take a look at this picture, you can see my bag strapped into the kayak on the left, with their bags in the larger one in the center. Because we are not smart men, we decided that "No, we don't need to rent a locker. We can bring our things with us. In small boats. On the open water. On a windy day with choppy seas. This is a good idea and we think we are smart". I gave my things to Nathan, who had a 'waterproof bag', because I am smart. So very smart....

Our route. Starting location in yellow,
the cafe-that-never-was in green, and
the location of the sinking in red

The Catastrophic Failure: 
Things started to go poorly when the two I was with started to lag behind. It turns out their boat was not sealed properly at some joint, and they had been slowly taking on water the entire time. On top of that, the conditions for boating were windy, meaning waves were landing in my lap and on my backpack. We paddle labourously for about 20 minutes, taking a short break from the waves & wind on a nearby island. Thinking that the other two were falling behind because of goofing around/being lazy I set off ahead of them because I'm hungry and want some lunch, thinking "I can't wait to take some pictures of this cafe". The picture below may be last image my camera will ever take. 

This is not a picture of a smart man

After more 10 minutes on the water, I hear a call from behind me, and see the other boat low in the water, with the guys struggling to keep it upright. I only have time to turn my kayak around when I see it go over, and with it my hopes that this would be a relaxing Sunday afternoon. I knew that was it. No lunch. No dry belongings. No pretending to be a famous world-explorer on the high seas. Fun's over, time to salvage what's left of the day. It was the kind of failure that is so incredibly defeating; A long, drawn out struggle, one that drains all hope and erodes your spirits like a slow fall that you attempt to stop with desperate failing & feeble footwork only to ultimately succumb to the the force of the ground rushing up to meet your face with pain and bitter shame. It was a 45 minute process of attempting to help the others mount the larger boat, salvage the floating flip-flops & paddles, argue amongst ourselves, tow the half-sunken boat to a nearby pile of barnacle-covered rocks surrounded by sea urchins, roll the boat over, wait for it to drain while being nibbled by all manners of sea creatures, and then get clumsily get back on and limp back to shore with ruined electronics, bloody hands & feet. I stayed in my boat, but I knew my belongings were toast, and by this point, the heavy cloud of failure casts such a burdening shame on everyone that the day becomes a write off entirely. By the time I returned home in wet clothes, finally ending the symphony of relentless squelches that only come from soaked shoes, I was ready for bed. 

List of Casualties from the Action on Shelter Bay: October 25th 2015 

 --- Fatalities ---
 - 1 Motorolla MotoG cell phone
 - 1 Sony RX100 digital camera (gift from a family friend)
 - 1 pair of Seinheiser earbuds
 - 2 songs to the school musical I wrote this weekend 
 - 2 fully written and enveloped letters ready for posting (Sorry Matt & Murray)
 - Friend's phones & belongings
 - Any remaining hope that I had in myself

 --- Wounded In Action ---
- 3 pairs of feet (courtesy of sea urchins, barnacles & rocks made of f!cking KNIVES)
- Handy Dandy Backpack (which is now very schmutzy indeed)
- 1 pair of running shoes
- 1 Canadian passport (including my photo ID on the main page)
- 1 leather wallet & paper contents (bills, cards, etc)
- 3 grown men's pride

 --- Survivors ---
- One Athletic shirt
- Camera SD card

I suppose, walking away from it, it wasn't such a bad day. My hands still hurt from clutching the barnacle-crusted rocks for a good half hour while the other two salvaged their kayak, but I got to experience something new. I also felt the gripping pain of loss as the realization sunk in that electronics are expensive and I have other things that need to be paid for (my phone and camera are sitting in a cleaning solution the internet recommended to me. They are my last hope). Maybe, walking away from it, I feel a little defeated. Defeat, in many ways, has become an old companion. It is a part of my life, and no matter how I attempt to learn from it, it returns to me as regularly as the sun's rise in the morning. Perhaps I should just stay inside, board up the windows, and pretend it's nighttime for the rest of my waking life.